Actual calls taken by us in the ER:
1) "I have a question. I am 39 weeks pregnant and I am having contractions - what should I do?"
2) Same caller above, calling back - "I called my doctor and he said to wait until the morning to come in and see him, but I am still having contractions and now I am bleeding, what should I do."
3) Caller: "My thermometer is giving me the temperature in celsius - can you tell me what that is in farenheit."
Me : "No ma'am I cannot the best thing I can tell you is look it up on the internet (for the conversion)"
Caller: "You mean you don't know the conversion."(in a very irritated, why don't you know kind of tone)
Me: "No ma'am I don't - we use farenheight as well."